august 12 2008

I AM THE BOGGLE CHAMPION

argued with the fam about whether or not people who shoot holes in the water tanks in the desert are murderers or not.  i say they are.  if you know thirsty people will be slogging through an area, and you shoot holes in containers full of water that could save their lives, how are you not a murderer?  family focused on all sorts of rationalizations for their actions, but the fact remains that they would be responsible for someone's death.

august 11 2008

mexican/carribean restaurant in asheville, salsa's?

best food ever.  seriously.

if i ever move somewhere new (unlikely), it will be asheville.

everyone says "hello."

every business seems local.

it's insular in that portland sort of way without being insular in that lincoln park/wicker park kind of way.  hippies, punks, social justice-y folks all hanging out together, the way it should be, yanno?

also, weird that the first time i went to asheville it was almost exactly four years ago to see this bike is a pipe bomb play outside of a warehouse... this summer, i borrow rymodee from tbiapb's amp to play a show in chicago!  small world.

august 10 2008

my mom is the best boggle player in the universe
the board spelled out "fuck," "slut," and "dick" today, we had a good laugh about those.

august 9 2008

"once there was a farm...
now there's an airport"

-advertisements in the pittsburgh airport

baxter has two bad legs now. he did his usual thing where he didn't recognize me at first, then he flipped out when he realized who i was, then he hurt himself trying to jump up and lick my face and limped around the rest of the night.

august 8 2008

jamie got knocked unconscious while we were playing

holy shit

she's okay

folk fest was friend overload, in a good way.

goodbye party at work was less awkward than expected, and actually kind of sweet.  i think it helped that yelene didn't show up til like 30 minutes before it was over.

august 7 2008

mauled by tigers fest day one last night

so fun

but it highlighted why i can't stay in this town

everyone who was there from chicago (except for me, ricky, john, toby, etc.) was sectioned off into little hang out groups.

john, ricky, rob and i revived the dance caucus.

everyone who wasn't from chicago was having a great time with each other.
well, not EVERYONE.

but i get the point.

hot new mexicans, the ergs!, lefty loosie, a buncha others.

cori is in san fran, i am jealous.

punch

Living in the Age of Terrorism, as we do, when the Streets are Unsafe at Night, and the Neighborhoods aren’t What They Used to Be, it is the narrator’s supreme hope that you will take this story with the utmost of seriousness. In years past, it may have been necessary to marginalize this True Story as a Parable or Metaphorical Commentary, but now that we are all busy Never Forgetting, the Average Reader will hopefully have learned to embrace the cold, harsh Reality of Random Violence and at least be comfortable with the idea of the overall Absurdity of Life once relegated to the pages of College Books.

Our story takes place in Jacksonville, a nice city sprawled lazily across the northeastern corner of Florida. The city is nestled against the underbelly of Georgia, and owes more to the sometimes anachronistic hospitality characteristic of the American South than it does to the bright lights, dance halls, and contemporary flair of Miami, or the gaudy touristic highways of Orlando. The city is preparing to celebrate the embrace of its one-millionth citizen, an achievement tracked by a bulletin board greeting every citizen crossing the St. John's River into the downtown area: "999,936! Get Ready, Jacksonville!"

august 6 2008

the man who helped the woman who wanted my mattress sounded like he was having a heart attack while we carried the mattress downstairs. he kept saying things i couldn't hear and laughing really loud. he had a kickass old astrovan.

august 5 2008

ever ting ess boxt

august 4 2008

i walked past some fresh cement today. some hooligan had scrawled FUCK into it. at this point in my life, i probably shouldn't be giggling.

august 3 2008

show at the evelands' tonight. definitely reached fever pitch. i got to lie on the ground and roll around with the microphone and be hoisted above the crowd, during one song. i'm pretty sure that's when you know it's working.

all the other bands were really good. i wish i'd seen/met the duders in cloudmouth way earlier. actually, i wish i could just re-do the first six months or so in chicago.

august 2 2008

dance partaaaaaay

holy shit, climbing rules

so sore today

couldn't even open the refrigerator

had to put both hands on it and then use my weight to pull it open

august 1 2008

thomas (not tom) wolfe sure was a racist

july 31 2008

talked to bob about the apartment. feel better about it now... he's under a bunch of stress, i'm under a bunch of stress, it's a big stress parade.

a couple of months before i left in phoenix, a man named rocky came up to me and told me how much he loved my songs... it took me a couple seconds, but i realized i'd actually met him before, about two years ago, after a mono show at modified. he told me he wanted to give me a tape of his band's music. i told him i would be flattered, but i didn't have a tape player. a couple weeks later, at the modified, rocky rode up on his bike and handed me a walkman.

"our tape is in there," he said.

that skinwalkers tape ruled pretty hard. i got to use that walkman this morning to listen to the split fran did with whitman. her side of it is really, really, really beautiful... she turned 4 of her favorite poems into songs, and they sound like they were always meant to be sung. whitman's half is perty good, too, but his vocals are way too low in the mix - or maybe my walkman is dying.

july 30 2008

bob is being really paranoid about the apartment. he is convinced that if there is a speck of dust on the kitchen floor when our landlord shows it to potential new renters, the landlord will keep all of our deposit. bear in mind - our kitchen floor is white tile, and he has two cats that shed fairly constantly. he's mopped it twice in the past 3 days.

he keeps prefacing his cleaning requests with "dude, i'm not trying to be a dick." he's not being a dick, just a huge, unnecessary pain my ass.

rejection from COAR job yesterday. will be hearing from the new times next week.

july 29 2008

the man who took two garbage bags full of jewel cases from me told me he's going to propose to his girlfriend soon

i love craigslist

july 28 2008

heard two really good stories on npr today.

one was on "the story" (which matt arbogast was on once, holy shit) about a man in south carolina who collected tin and daguerrotype (sp?) portraits of slaves.

he found out that a pictures of his great-great-great grandmother was in the possession of the plantation-owners who still lived in his hometown.

when he went to see it, he had a moment. apparently the woman who lived at the plantation, who was in her 80s, referred to his g-g-g-grandma as "aunt nursey," and spoke with overpowering affection about her. it rocked the storyteller's world that slave owners could view their human property as more than cattle. complicated.

the other story i heard was on another show - don't remember the name. it was about a u.s. bomber that crashed into the empire state building in 1945. a woman talked about watching her boss's head catch on fire. she threw her rings out the window while she hid in a corner office. "i figured somebody oughta get some use out of them."

it was an absurd statement that made sense in a way that kind of crushed my soul for a second.

whenever i hear/read pieces like that, i wonder if i'm making a mistake in not pursuing journalism much harder.

july 27 2008

i'm usually afraid to ask people to do things because i'm afraid they'll think i just love them for what they do, when in reality i am in love with a lot of people for who they are... oftentimes, in spite of what they do.

scented candles to make: freshly sliced bell peppers, used bookstore.

july 26 2008

dark knight was really good.

a lot of the criticism that i read (and there wasn't much) derived from people wanting it to be something very specific, then faulting it for not living up to their idea of what the movie should've been trying to do.

i hate all "cultural" reviews sometimes.

anyway, i really, really liked it. and i don't think saying things in the BatVoice will be unfunny anytime soon.

july 25 2008

if i had to sum up my philosophy on humanity in one sentence, it would probably be: everyone's an asshole sometimes.

ghost mice show in the burbs today
burbed it up
with the burbkids + reddelicious
really fun

july 24 2008

the only place i could get an appointment with a doctor was in chinatown. i was the only one there not speaking in chinese. there was an awkward moment when the doctor asked me if i moved my butt every day. i said "what?" and she said "i mean your bowels - you have bowel movements every day?"

i do, if you are curious.

antibiotics + cough medicine, the horowitz cocktail. hopefully it works.

july 23 2008

halo fauna + porches + the gunshy + y lime? + blueberry fist @ weiser house. then falafel + cookies + arrested development with the gang at the house of todd.

really, really fun show. this was the first night i realized i was going to miss chicago after all. mostly because a lot of the friends i made in the city were in one place. not everyone i think is rad here - just almost everyone i feel real close to.

july 22 2008

had a real good talk with alex tonight.

july 21 2008

plus: adam, kellyanna, martin, yasi for dinner.
minus: batman sold out.

minus: my brain.

july 20 2008

i miss corinne a lot. a lot a lot alot alot.

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wii-riffic.
dan we'rewolves: nicest dude ever.
dave from echo base collective. riding his bike across the country. assaulted by beer bottles and unnecessary cavity searches.
chips ahoy for breakfast.
macaroni salad for lunch.
aloo palak (spinach + potatoes) for dinner with yasi (?!) and her friend from boston, martin, and ricky.

show at colin's house ruled. i have a better jumpshot than i used to. emily's new zine is real good. mutiny amongst friends are pretty fun. this ship is sinking: against me! cover rules. good bands all around. all weekend. sweet dudes.

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. ahem, wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.

july 19 2008

milwaukee is awesome

porches has now officially played an officially sparks sponsored event
fuel coffee shop was so good, bar guy had such a good bad attitude
the vault rules SO HARD
new friends
forgetting to put a price thingie near our cds, so people took them for free, about 30 of them
bummer: missing the zinefest by 3 minutes.
epic: finding a bag full of bruschetta afterwards
super epic: dance caucus
VLT
"is that man wearing a dress? that's none of my business" - man telling us "the dirty abcs"
"i saw a seventeen year old blind pit bull"
"he bit his lip taking a bong rip and needed 13 stitches. you try singing at summerfest after that!"

so good...

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in chicago, saw a woman beating a pug for no reason on the street friday night. in front of her 6 or 7 year old daughter, who was stonefaced, hugging a teddy bear, while the mother hit the pug really fucking hard because it had walked off the steps on the front porch. she called it a motherfucker.

stephen's brother andy made out with a girl he met on the sidewalk and went skinny dipping with. crazy, that stuff just happens in movies.

i wish that stuff wouldn't stick with me for so long.

july 18 2008

random encounter of the month: i bumped into elise on the train. elise and kara were two really rad women i met at vista training in august. we hung out a couple times, then i lost my phone and couldn't find them on the interwebs.

i guess kara hated her vista thing so much, she quit and moved back to kansas.

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i pushed a "customer assistance" button on accident waiting for a train once. a page went off through the entire station saying "customer needs assistance." the train didn't come for 9 minutes after, and no one had come up to see if someone needed help.

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played with cloudmouth and scout's honor and tina sparkle tonight. fun. milwaukee all weekend. first test of my commitment to update this once per day (even if that means retroactively).

july 17 2008

saw french quarter and glochids play tonight. a lot of good memories there. favorite, maybe: show at the palace, me and a few others sitting on the porch underneath our front window. we'd sit there to tell people to go in the back way while bands played. we could still hear the music.

it was a good show (most of them were. all of them were, except the last one, actually). the living room was packed. good friends and good musicians. stephen started playing one of his songs. he can play each of his songs in what seems like a dozen different ways, depending on his mood; he started playing one as a bit of a stomper. and the room started percussing, clapping or banging chairs or snapping, in dozens of different rhythms that all came together wonderfully.

it also makes me smile to think how i used to be intimidated by stephen. i don't have anything else to remind me of on that other than that stephen is a really great person. he makes me feel really good about myself.

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i've been having this pain in my gut all week. it is scaring me a little bit. like a constant, dull, burning knife up through where my ribs meet down to my upper stomach. i don't have much of an appetite and i feel tired and sore a lot. i hope it goes away soon.

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day started off nice. talked to a guy on the bus about chicago and racists. a frequent conversation of late. he smiled the whole time we talked and seemed stoked on life in general.

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my desire to not wake up and go to work is so palatable i feel like i am having a conversation with it right now.

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teague cullen might be the best musician ever

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love
ben

july 16 2008

where does change really come from?

is it the result of millions of dollars and work-hours and years of lobbying? is it the willingness to take a risk by individual politicians? does it take a catalyzing public event, like the brutality of fire hoses and southern police during the protests and marches against segregation?

there are a lot of job opportunities posted for big advocacy groups, like pirg and the sierra club. these groups are famous of late for putting teenagers and twentysomethings on street corners to ask you if you (and your pocketbook) care about the environment.

the jobs have ambitious titles like "community outreach organizer" or "youth coordinator."

i'm hesitant to apply for these positions. working in an office for a year has given me enough alienation to last a lifetime, even though i am super high on the idea/basic premise of the organization i'm working for. with the sierra club and pirg, i have enough doubts about their methods and size that i think i'm going to pass for now.

i want a couple years of being told what to do, honestly. "teach these kids." "write these articles." "edit these papers." i've had enough of being a "liaison" - "building capacity and sustainability" - for now.

this'll probably all change tomorrow, anyway.

---------

jobs applied for (level of interest):

outreach coordinator for some LEGO robot program for kids at ASU (robots! destroy! could be cool?): rejected, pre-interview.
phoenix teaching corps (gung ho! cautious at best.): rejected, post-interview.
new times music editor (stoked on the possibility): pending.
community outreach and advocacy for refugees (stoked on the possibility): pending, interview kinda scheduled.
some kinda curriculum editor at the University of Phoenix: pending.

july 15 2008

spent a good two hours talking to my downstairs neighbor tonight. i should say i spent a good 105 minutes listening - the man seemed to be in the mood to talk, and i was in a listening mood.

stitch was a punk rocker. he saw the clash, the buzzcocks, gun club, richard hell and the voidoids, the jesus and mary chain, magazine, the cramps (his favorite), the ramones, and many more back at the turn of the decade, before the 80's.

now, he's a recovering alcoholic, and he says, "i can't listen to anything that's too rowdy, you know, because..." (universal drinking-of-beer hand motion and a stitch laugh)

he also studied islamic law. he was raised a socialist zionist, then allied himself with palestinian radicals, studied islamic law at an islamic university, converted to lutheranism for a gentile wife, attends catholic mass and episcopalian church services. he worked in the rare book trade for 12 years. now he runs the new age "hoo-doo" store downstairs, with a gothy girl and a gnostic priest. he does rune readings for all kinds of people, "even politicians."

when he was in high school, he was targeted by the federal government. he was pretty heavily involved in the young socialist movement, and led protests at his school in skokie. apparently, federal agents would show up at his dad's work and ask him very publicly and loudly about his son's communist activities (trying to get his dad canned).

then, he went through a heavy libertarian streak. he's still a little bit maoist. he's a voracious reader of political writing.

he gave me a tip about a nature preserve on the north side. i'll have to check it out. near pulaski, on the green line.

he also talked a lot about health care. i'd write more about that if i had the mental energy - basically, we need universal health care. if you disagree, you haven't met the right people, or heard the right stories.

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i gave john, my backyard neighbor, my old bike frame. he offered to pay me, but i know he doesn't have much money, so i gave it to him, because i'm pretty sure he'll put it to good use. he said he might give me a 12 pack of beer, though. we talked a lot about pigeon shit.

john is an interesting guy. i'll write more about him another day, probably.

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due to an ignorant purchase in light of attending a vegan barbeque, i ended up with 12 hot dog buns after this weekend. 6 of the whole foods whole wheat variety, 6 of the cheap-bin white variety. if you think you know which one was vegan, you might be wrong.

anyway. the first time i had tofu dogs, it was before i was a real vegetarian (if you can count my lazy ass as a "real" vegetarian now). i saw them next to the hot dogs in the grocery store when i was on one of my health kicks. i thought, "oh, man... all the deliciousness of hot dogs, without the calories, fat, or sodium? count me in!"

when i got home and tried one, i died on the inside. it was probably in my top five worst eating experiences. three years later, i have definitely made my peace with veggie sausage - but i hadn't tried a tofu dog since. tofu dogs are less than half the price of veggie sausages, though, so i figured it was worth a shot. i picked up a couple bell peppers and poblanos to roast and throw on top with some leftover cole slaw i made for some delicious tacos.

they turned out alright, i guess. i didn't gag or dislike the taste, and i didn't have to smother them with mustard or ketchup to enjoy my eating experience.

july 14 2008

riding the bus and taking the train aren't nearly so romantic when you do it an hour or two every day. most people, most days seem to be doing their best not to be noticed or make eye contact. self included.

exceptions: 14-year-old boys interested in my sex life (e.g. do you have a girlfriend? yeah. man, i got a girlfriend, she won't put out, though. how do i get her to do it? you do it with your girlfriend? you should respect her, man, and it's really not that important fuck you, faggot ass!)

i am such a gentleman.

everytime i get called a faggot now, i think of the guy in high school who would always call me faggot during photography class with his wrestling, key club buddies. bumped into an old friend in DC, and it turns out he's openly gay now. que ironico!

i found an empty king cobra, an empty, tiny bottle of vodka, and an empty pack of rolling papers in my seat today. i think that means i win bus yahtzee!

this guy sitting kitty-corner to me was boxing the seat in front of him. he had headphones. i really wanted to know what he was listening to. he wasn't buff, but he was in work-out clothes. broad-shouldered and tough-looking. at one point he looked at himself in his reflection in the window and gave himself a "whatcha gonna do?" shrug and smile.

practiced with zak, victor, and ricky today. pretty excited for our show at ronny's on friday.

listening to lots of aggro music. the south, malakai, refused. it makes me feel young and happy. especially the south.